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   Deadly family violence takes a troubling surge

Posted on Mon, Dec. 15, 2003       
SANTA CLARA: RESIDENTS WILL EXPLORE WAYS TO COPE:
By Connie Skipitares
Mercury News

For most of the 1990s, the high-tech hub and family-friendly enclave of Santa Clara saw one or two homicides a year.

There were none in 2000 and 2001. But in the past 20 months, 10 people have been killed in the city of 100,000.

Nine of the victims were from three families wiped out in what investigators said were murder-suicides. Seven children, ages 3 to 12, are included among the dead. Most were shot as they slept. Two were smothered and drowned.

After a third such multiple slaying stunned the city's old Victorian neighborhood near Santa Clara University last weekend, city leaders, police and domestic violence experts have decided to hold a community meeting Wednesday to explore ways to stop family violence.

``We know people in the community are hurting,'' Santa Clara Police Chief Steve Lodge said, ``from those who knew the family to the officers who responded who have children of their own.''

Grief counselors will provide support and talk about warning signs to spot trouble in families before it spins out of control and ends in the ultimate act of domestic violence -- murder.

``We wanted people to have a place to be able to express their feelings, to help them cope,'' Lodge said. ``And we want to tell them that there are always steps that can be taken before violence erupts.''

Experts puzzled

Experts are hard-pressed to explain why more children are becoming victims in domestic violence tragedies. Fifteen of the 150 people killed by family members in Santa Clara County since 1994 have been children; 12 of those children have been killed in the past two years, including the death Saturday of 4-year-old Xiomara Tocalino of Santa Cruz, who was allegedly killed by her mother at her great-grandmother's house in San Jose. The mother, Yesenia Quevedo, 27, of Santa Cruz, is in custody.

Many killers take their children's lives as a way to get back at a spouse, often the mother of the children, said Rolanda Pierre-Dixon, who heads the domestic violence unit in the Santa Clara County District Attorney's Office.

``It's a way of saying, `I'm going to fix the wife. She is going to pay,' '' Pierre-Dixon said.

In each of the city of Santa Clara's apparent murder-suicides, police had no forewarning that trouble was brewing in the families. There were no 911 calls from neighbors, friends or the victims before the killings.

Psychologists say that a majority of family slayings happen after one spouse suggests divorce. The other can't handle losing control of the relationship. Job loss and other economic pressures can also fuel the violence.

Todd Vernon, 37, was an unemployed truck driver whose wife, Nadine, 39, had a successful career coordinating trade shows for Adobe Systems. She had confided in a friend that she wanted out of the six-year marriage and had grown tired of her husband ``always being under foot'' since he left his job this summer.

Police say he shot her and his three children, who were visiting from Orange County, then turned the .357 Magnum on himself. Police found the bodies Dec. 6.

In the suicide note Vernon sent by FedEx to his mother's Orange County home, he said he couldn't live without Nadine and he couldn't stand the thought of someone else raising his three children from a previous marriage. By killing the kids, experts say, he was taking the children away from his first wife, with whom he had bitterly fought for custody.

Vernon's unthinkable act, like many such cases, left neighbors and close family members wondering how a man they described as a ``doting father'' and a couple they saw as ``madly in love'' could reach such a bloody ending. They lived a well-heeled life with expensive cars, his and hers Harley Davidsons, a speedboat and a school-bus-size RV. They built a home in Hawaii and traveled extensively on boating trips.

Neighbors also described Jose Jesus Zacarias as a devoted father before the part-time grocery clerk allegedly smothered and drowned his 3-year-old son and a 12-year-old stepdaughter from his wife's previous marriage in April. The children's mother found them in their beds when she returned from work, but her husband was missing. Police say he drove to Santa Cruz and jumped off a cliff to his death.

Earlier slayings

Marital problems underlay another multiple slaying in Santa Clara in April 2002. According to police, Tae Young Schiefer shot and killed her husband, Uli, and her two children after Uli said he wanted a divorce.

``For a community of our size to have three such events, it's really time for some community outreach,'' said Santa Clara Mayor Patricia Mahan, a lawyer whose practice deals partly with family court issues. ``You wish there had been some outward signs. Unfortunately, when people feel stress in their family they hide it. We need to get people to reach out.''

Shocking as the slayings always are to friends and even close relatives, domestic violence experts say being blindsided is not surprising. Many couples struggling through marital woes often keep problems -- and fears -- bottled up, showing the world happy faces. They don't seek help, despite an abundance of services, because they don't view their problems as serious.

``Some people think because they are not being beaten, they don't see themselves calling a domestic violence hotline,'' Dixon said. ``They may be very depressed, but not suicidal, so they don't see the need to call a suicide hotline. And many people can't handle the idea that the person they fell in love with could cause them or their children harm.''

Pierre-Dixon admonishes those who fear a spouse to rid the home of any guns. Gunfire is a major cause of death in domestic disputes. Seventeen of the 18 domestic violence deaths in Santa Clara County last year were shootings. Guns often are purchased by a family member months before an act of domestic violence occurs, she said.

Over period of time

``The killer doesn't just snap one day,'' she said.

Police discovered five guns in the Vernon home, in addition to the gun Todd Vernon had in his hand when his family's bodies were found. All were legally owned.

Pierre-Dixon believes friends, relatives and neighbors who sense someone is in a troubled relationship should be aggressive in delving deeper. They should get that person to a domestic violence counselor, help get a restraining order or help them pack.

``Don't hesitate to stick your nose in their business. Not enough people do it,'' she said. ``These things don't come down without warning. Don't be afraid of offending anyone. Do you want to be the one standing over your friend's grave regretting that you didn't do anything?''

IF YOU'RE INTERESTED

The meeting on Wednesday is at 7 p.m. at the Santa Clara Senior Center, Fremont and Monroe streets, Santa Clara.

For information on shelter or counseling services, call Next Door: Solutions to Domestic Violence at (408) 279-2962 (languages include English, Spanish, Vietnamese); Support Network for Battered Women at 1 (800) 572-2782; and Asian Women's Home (Mandarin, Cambodian, Korean, Farsi, Vietnamese) at (408) 975-2739.
Contact Connie Skipitares at cskipitares@mercurynews. com or (408) 920-5647.